“I see,” Ray said, a mug of hot chocolate in his hand. “Nice ugly history there.”



“That’s why we have to stay on the lookout, and make sure he doesn’t try anything funny,” Winston said. “Imagine what kind of trouble he’ll cause in New York.”
“Eh, no big deal,” Peter yawned. “We handle stuff like this all the time. Sometimes we get worse.”
The alarm sounded, ending all further discussion, and the Ghostbusters jumped down the firepole and piled into ECTO-1A.



The ECTO-1A screamed out of the firehouse, its unusual siren wailing.
Janine called them on their radio, directing them to a movie theater where the Film Forum was screening the Vincent Price movie House on Haunted Hill.



“Hey! Wait for me, you guys!” Louis Tully, their nerdy accountant-cum-fifth-Ghostbuster whined as the ECTO-1A sped off into the distance. Wearing his thick, black, horn-rimmed eyeglasses and an ill-fitting yellow G.B. uniform, Louis desperately wanted to be part of the team. Unfortunately, he proved to be far too clumsy—even for the Ghostbusters’ standards—to don and use a Proton Pack with any proficiency; Slimer, their pet ghost, still had the scars from last time.

The front door of the apartment flew open, and Janosz burst in. Just before going home, he’d stopped at the hardware shop to buy a large Rubbermaid basin, with which he would collect enough pink slime to fuel his plans. He turned the basin upside down and sat upon it, cracking open The Book of Nasty Magic, Vol. 1. He flicked through it until he found an interesting chapter, entitled “Fun with Slime”. The chapter contained numerous spells and incantations, including one to create a whole gallon of slime from just a cupful, one to create copies of people from a quantity of slime, and one to turn a quantity of slime into a communicator to the Spirit World. All of these spells looked good to Janosz, and the last one especially intrigued him.
Excited, he skimmed ahead to the chapter, “Ghosts and Spirits”. He went down a long list of ghouls and goblins, muttering each one’s name as he went along. “Gozer the Destructor–seems too dangerous…Vigo the Carpathian—I’ve met him already…Sutekh the Destroyer—too chaotic…the ghost of McCarthy—I’d rather not…the Spirits of Christmas Past, Present, and Future—ooh, I like that one…ah, who’s this? Voltar, the Ghost Wizard? Sounds interesting…this thing reads like the White Pages!” He put his finger on Voltar’s entry, and suddenly the words on the page started to change, until the index was replaced by mystical shapes and incantations in dead languages.



Janosz transferred the mystical diagrams onto a piece of paper and placed it dead center in the basin. He picked up the jar of slime he’d collected, intending to pour it into the basin…and he paused for a moment. Realizing that this could get very messy very quickly, he decided to take his fiendish work outside.



Taking up the basin, the jar of slime, the book, and the diagram, Janosz headed out of his apartment, to the outside of the building.



Once outdoors, where the slime couldn’t leave a great big mess, Janosz set his basin down, transferred the slime from the jar into it, and read the Slime Expander incantation.
“Offob…si…ockos…ocohc,” he declared. The slime bubbled up and soon the basin was full of pulsing, glowing pink slime. Then he read the Summoning Spell for Voltar, the Ghost Wizard.
“Meka leka hi meka hiney ho…meka leka hi meka channy ho…mola meka channa maka mola mala hey!”



Suddenly the slime turned cloudy, going from a translucent pink to a more solid pink, with deep purple streaks shot through it. Lightning filled came from nowhere as the slime started to glow with an energy all of its own, and then…it rose up out of the basin and took on a humanoid form! It became a tall, powerfully-built man, dressed in pink and purple robes.



“Ahhh,” he said. “Finally, I have escaped my spectral prison…” He surveyed his new surroundings, taking note of the man in the room, sitting nervously, fearful of this new visitor. “…and you have freed me from it,” the tall ghost said, a note of kindness entering his voice. “Allow me to introduce myself. I am Voltar, the Ghost Wizard. Since you have been so considerate, I will grant you one wish. What is it you desire most?”



“The Ghostbusters,” Janosz said, angrily.
“Ghostbusters?” Voltar asked, intrigued. “There are such men in this world? Men who can defeat ghosts?” “Yes. I allied myself with Vigo the Carpathian last year, and they defeated both of us.”
“Ah, yes, Vigo the Carpathian. He had such a wonderful sense of humor.”
“But you are not fearing the Ghostbusters?”
“Why should I? I am, after all, an extremely powerful Ghost Wizard. I can crush them as easily as I would a child’s dreams. But first, you will help me get acquainted with this world…any prospective ruler should know his surroundings.”

Meanwhile, the Film Forum was in full swing. Today’s film was a showing of House on Haunted Hill, the old 1958 Vincent Price movie best known for having a trick skeleton emerge from a hidden trapdoor at a specific moment. This particular screening was to feature a recreation of William Castle’s “skeleton on wires” trick. Onscreen, the cover over the acid pit pulled up, and the skeleton inside emerged to terrorize Carol Ohmart’s character as Price’s voice taunted her from some hidden alcove.


The projectionist threw the switch, but nothing happened. Suddenly, the screen itself began to bulge, as if something were trying to claw its way out, and a ghostly skeleton emerged, terrorizing the audience and laughing maniacally.
Several minutes later, the theater doors violently swung open, heralding the arrival of the Ghostbusters, who raised their nutrona wands and hurled particle beams at the spook.


“Easy now, boys,” Ray instructed. “Peter, start bringing your beam to the right a little bit. Winston, pull yours in to the left. Egon, start pulling back. I’ll bring mine in forward.” The skeleton struggled against the proton beams, to no avail. Peter and Winston gave one more tug,, and wrenched the skull from the body in the process. Egon and Ray had a better time with the body, which didn’t put up much of a fight, but that skull gave Peter and Winston a real hard time.


“A little help here, guys?” Peter moaned. Egon checked his PKE meter and said, “We need to combine the skull and the body into one confinement beam. “Easier said than done,” Winston grunted “This one here’s givin’ me the business.” Egon called to Ray, telling him to help Peter and Winston with the skull. “Don’t worry, I can manage with the body.”